What can I say?
You know how it is, right? ( PLEASE tell me you do… come on, humor me!)
It was just one of those days where my head wasn’t quite in the game the way it should have been.
My head was full of all kids of things… from all the many things that need to be done to over analyzing situations to organizing words to compiling all sorts of scenarios to sorting through all kinds of thoughts flitting around in my noggin.
Worrying even set in a little today! <GASP> I know, I still have some time to be giving up my worries; Lent isn’t over yet.
Today was one of those days that nothing came out right. In the relation to thoughts and words that is…
Things just weren’t adding up! From work to personal stuff to anything and everything in between.
It was the kind of day where you’ve got sooooo much going through your head… so much you want to say or do and you just simply can’t find the words to put to it.
Before you speak, think: Is it necessary? Is it true? Is it kind? Will it hurt anyone? Will it improve on the silence?”
Sri Sathya Sai Baba
Some things I was reminded of today….
Insert foot into mouth, Er … Think before you speak…
A dying art form….
I know I’ve done it… If you’re honest with yourself, I’m pretty sure you’ve done it too. Ever said anything and wished immediately you could take it back?
Generally I don’t have a problem with this, but many, many people just don’t think before they speak! I am amazed at times by the things that come out of some people’s mouths and their lack of a “filter.” Some people don’t even give themselves time to process what is coming outta their mouths! Stop a second people… give your noggin’ a second to catch up with your mouth. What you say and how you say it matters to people.
I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”
Diarrhea of the mouth…. Ughhh. If you’ve got something that you don’t want anyone else to know… DON’T tell anyone! Unless
you’ve got that person’s complete and utter trust and they’ve got yours, your secrets are meant to be left just that. SECRETS. Don’t tell Suzie at the water cooler about you mom’s, sister’s, dog’s cat and expect your “secret” to stay put. People infected with diarrhea of the mouth don’t know their limits… they simply can’t help themselves. ESPECIALLY when you tell them not to say anything. The whole world is bound to know in a matter of mere minutes if not seconds.
The first duty of love is to listen.
Don’t be a “nodder”, LISTEN when someone is speaking.
I consider myself to be a really good listener… I’ve been told so by a few people. I like to listen actually, I really, really do. Listening pays off in the end. Listening shows a person that you care enough to pay attention; shows people who you care and helps you to forge further communication in the future. Don’t stare off into space and nod every once in a while. Sometimes those closest to you need you to listen and listen only… words and responses aren’t needed. Just an ear so they can talk things out, release their worries or thoughts…
Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.
Use your words, choose your words… We remind our littles of this everyday. Reminders to use words instead of screaming and nice words instead of angry words. Very solid advice for most of us don’t you think? It’s best to tell others how you feel or what you’re thinking. The key though is using words that aren’t hurtful or disrespectful. Choose your words carefully… use your words. Bottling up emotions or thoughts does little to no good. If you don’t feel you can voice your thoughts, express them one way or another…
Don’t over think… This I am guilty of through and through… Always have been, always will be. This ties in with the “Worrier”
that I am. Just ask my friends both old and new. I think and think and think and think until there is nothing left to think about excepting for the fact that I think too much. From the weather to work to personal matters to friends and family to everything and anything in between. I think about the words I want to say way before I say them; I over think the words of others and read into them way more than ever intended. It doesn’t stop there either. I over think silences just as much as I do the words. For me the silence can often times be worse because then I am left to my own devices leading myself through all sort of scenarios that came outta nowhere but my own concoction of ideas. Some how, I’ve learned that over thinking can lead to more thinking about other issues and little to no progress gets made; yet I still over think. And for the record…. don’t assume. Just ask.
Silence is best…
Sometimes there are no words. For me it doesn’t happen often as many can attest to my love of talking and writing and just using words in general. But seriously there are times when I just can’t find the words to express exactly what I’m feeling. Or even times when nothing needs to be said. Silence between friends or in a relationship can be totally appropriate and acceptable. realizing such times can be difficult, but with those who know and love me best (and I them) it just seems to be understood. Sometimes a look or a hug is all that is needed. Tied into the listening aspect, sometimes you just need an ear to listen… the friend that knows what you need without you saying so is the best kind to have around.
It takes courage to use my words and share them. Whether sharing my writing here with you or confiding in a friend… I’ve gotten more confident in the sharing of my thoughts and the importance of my words. Finding my voice was a long road travelled. there was a time when I couldn’t always say what was on my mind let alone share it with you. I’ve found that as I’ve gotten older it has become much easier to share my thoughts and words with those closest to me. I’ve learned with whom my words will be safe… I’ve learned that saying what you think and feel is important, but how you say it is even more important. For me, WORDS hold a powerful presence in my every day life.
FOR ME… Using my words and chosing my words is probably one of the single most important gifts I have.
Sometimes you have to take a chance and share a piece of yourself with someone; sometimes you have to “swallow the frog” saying things you never thought you would have to say to someone; sometimes you’ve gotta take a leap of faith and use your words; sometimes you’ve gotta know when silence is not only okay but very much-needed; sometimes you’ve gotta know when to listen and not speak.
The toughest of all remains deciphering which is best for you in that given moment.
Today, words were all over the place for me. Flitting through my head, written on paper, used in conversation, spoken over the phone, in texts, written in a lengthy email; in the writing of this post. Yet somehow as the day is near its end, I’ve still got tons of words floating around in there… The only difference being they are a bit more put together now than they were earlier today.
Do you ever have times where words just seem to escape you? Have you ever shared thoughts with someone and were unsure of their thoughts on the matter? How do you best express yourself when happy, upset or worried?
TODAY my friends was one of those days for me…